My daughter got married today!! Need I say more? Those of us mom’s know how much more lives beyond those words—the emotion that stands like a dam ready to be released.
I sit here after the weekend of my second born’s wedding, and somehow I can’t begin to express my feelings—that want to dance off the pages and swing to the universal song of the norm, but yet are stifled on the fray of my mind.
I am somehow saddened, but yet I’m not sure why. Is it the ghost of the past that haunts me, or is it the sting of my baby growing up? Maybe a little of both.
Bill...what to say? Here is the man that fathered both of my children, and of whom I knew at some guttural sense of my being, was my soul mate, but perhaps not meant to be in this life time...the man whom I met at age 19 and who changed my life. But here we are so many years later able to laugh and love over our children—how blessed are we? I know not many can say the same—not many can sit across from each other with their new spouses and be truly happy for each other. How gifted we are, that we have found each other—after thirty years—as compatriot beings with similar values for our children—that we still value one another as individuals.
We reminisce and discuss old times like chums, but still feel the oddity of our past haunting us—conflicted by old wounds and old yearnings—they creep at the fringe of our souls and eat at us like yeast.
Where have you been, my long lost friend? It’s as though my soul has been awakened—our familiar bond as friendly as a bright sunrise. But alas our daughter has found her soul mate and we rejoice in the finding of a new and wonderful family that has joined, rejoined, and repaired some old wounds!